Wednesdays, we hand our sins to the Pastor. A bit like confession, we
all parade before Him and tell him of our sins and misdemeanours over
the previous week.
Pastor Jack then imposes a penance, which
usually comprises both a financial penalty and a few chores around the
then uses this money to buy alcohol, sex, drugs and cigarettes so that
he can sin on our behalf. Thus, if a member feels lustful, the Pastor
will exercise lust by doing rude things with a prostitute, after which
he will try to convert her of course.
Similarly, if a member feels a desire to drink
alcohol, upon confessing this sin the Pastor will get drunk to remove
the sin from the poor suffering individual.
By doing these things, the Pastor
places his own sanity, health and safety at risk. He also jeopardises his
place in the new born hereafter. However, he loves us so much that he is
prepared to do this for us. He's some man is Pastor Jack.