Wednesday
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On Wednesdays, we hand our sins to the Pastor. A bit like confession, we all parade before Him and tell him of our sins and misdemeanours over the previous week.

Pastor Jack then imposes a penance, which usually comprises both a financial penalty and a few chores around the Cult HQ.

The Pastor then uses this money to buy alcohol, sex, drugs and cigarettes so that he can sin on our behalf. Thus, if a member feels lustful, the Pastor will exercise lust by doing rude things with a prostitute, after which he will try to convert her of course.

Similarly, if a member feels a desire to drink alcohol, upon confessing this sin the Pastor will get drunk to remove the sin from the poor suffering individual.

By doing these things, the Pastor places his own sanity, health and safety at risk. He also jeopardises his place in the new born hereafter. However, he loves us so much that he is prepared to do this for us. He's some man is Pastor Jack. 

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